Amateur #3 Well, summer is over, vacation time is coming to an end, which means that it’s time to do everyday things – for example, write reviews of various unknown films. Today I have a rather strange copy, which can be seen by the name. Honestly, I didn't even watch it until the end. A lot of people might say, ‘You can’t write a review of a movie if you haven’t seen it,’ and I would agree with them if they said anything else. It takes 40 minutes and the last five minutes to figure out what’s going on. But everything in order.
So, before us at all, do not understand that Randy Smith and April Campbell Horror and Hamsters. This film is a horror almanac with quite interesting inserts, which I will talk about later. It is easy to guess that this is amateurism in all its manifestations - absolutely unprofessional shooting, disgusting and sometimes annoying play of actors, about the script I generally remain silent.
Cinema (haha, cinema) begins with an introduction in which a strange-looking girl announces to us that now we will plunge into the world of horror short films. Well, okay, I love short films. But after a couple of seconds, a moronic-looking man gets involved in the frame, who plays the brother of this girl and says that there will also be hamsters in the film. The girl somehow agrees to this and we are told that before any self-respecting film should go trailer. The next three minutes is a left-hand trailer.
It’s easy to guess that immediately after that begins the first short film, which just struck me off the hook. I love horror comedies, I love non-cash horror movies, I love thrash, but this short just struck me as empty. She's stupid about nothing, I'm serious. I haven’t seen a horror story in a long time. Well, the first pancake, you can close your eyes to it.
The film continues with a sketch of “A Tiny Hamster in a Tiny Mansion”, where we are given about 5 minutes to enjoy the footage where the tiny hamster wakes up in a crib, has breakfast, takes a bath, eats strawberries and rides in a car. I don't think there's any comment here, it's just a tiny hamster in a tiny mansion.
The second short was even worse than the first. I thought it was worse, but it did. Completely incomprehensible annoying soundtrack (I play guitar myself, but for several minutes in a row to race the same 4 chords with the same fight without text - here and crazy you can go).
As soon as the short film is over, we are presented with a sketch of "A Tiny Hamster on a Tiny Playground." Then comes the third short, which turns out to be on exactly the same level as the first two, and is followed by a sketch of "Hamster Competitions: A Test of Agility." Cutlet vs. Garbage, where we are shown a race of hamsters named Putlet and Garbage. I will not spoil who won, believe me, you will definitely want to know for yourself.
Based on the above, one conclusion can be drawn: this is a movie of friends for friends. How it got anywhere further, I can't understand. And it was made for quite a long time – scenes with hamsters were shot in 2014, some short films in 2015, and some in 2018. I don't want to scold him too much - the guys just jokingly filmed their ideas for several years, and then decided to put it all together. I’m sure they have a permanent job that’s not related to movies, and this job is just a reflection of their hobby. However, there are always local jokes and memes between friends, which is not understood by another viewer. I wouldn’t be surprised if they were weary when they filmed this thing, but it was difficult for me, as an ordinary viewer, to watch these curves. Movies (if you can call them that) are just for you. What it does on the Internet is not clear. I will not recommend it to anyone, even though the idea is unusual. This is just a movie for their own, it will be difficult for an ordinary viewer to watch it.
Thank you for listening.