New Year's Eve. The new master of the dolls was a distant relative of Andre Toulon, who, together with his daughter, is trying to give plastic creations a new life. Meanwhile, the insidious headmistress of a toy factory wants Toulon’s unchanging secret, and for this she is ready to use Demonic toys – the Poop-Matcher, the clown and the teddy bear. The Battle of the Titans is coming!
This is the worst (at the moment) movie of the series. Against his background, even 'Heritage' looks like a strong average - there was at least restored the chronology of the cycle, and a pretty killer bought. There's nothing here. More precisely, there is - absurdity, idiocy and absolute disregard of Bandu to the series.
What's wrong? Okay. The plot ... it can not even be called a plot. The movie takes an hour and a half, but believe me, it will be your longest moments of your life. The main character performed by Corey Feldman carries out frank nonsense and now and then mixes something in the flasks; the evil headmistress blonde drags her employees into the basement and through a terrible murder drains their blood to summon a demon ... Funny? No, it's scary. And this nonsense will be exaggerated for an hour (I’m not kidding). In addition, why put a storyline about a policeman who rolls back and forth and gives gifts to her niece. What about the Dolls? And demon toys? They're the background here. The first 90 percent of the time is sitting idle or lying in a drawer (supposedly exhausted because they can’t function without blood; why if they didn’t need any fuel before?) Band knows. Of demonic toys, only the navel flashes in the frame (more precisely, it makes stupid jokes and flies on farts - ahaha, how funny), the bear and the clown are generally sitting idle. Well, the last couple of times will try to do something (buried in the chest of some girl), and the bear is generally depressing.
And then there’s their owner – some clown with horns (at the end will appear in a costume of Santa Claus), who... does nothing either. Add to that no acting, no special effects (in 2004, and Full Moon is still stuck in the 80s) and the squalid dialogue that seemed to be written on the go. What are you saying? Demonic toy fight with Dolls? Well... there is, but it does not get easier. First, not much. And secondly – poor due to poor animation and lack of any dynamics.
And in this obscurantism they crammed a New Year's hue... What a shade of Band if there's not even snow in the frame! What's New Year's Eve? Why is it even there, if the plot (yes, plot) does not play a role? An extra attempt to give color to this poverty.
'The Doll Lord vs. Demon Toys' is one of Full Moon's most terrifying creations. Hellish torture lasting an hour and a half, devoid of any positive qualities inherent in the series '. ..'.
Well, we're kind of getting back on track, finishing the Master to the end. On the queue - crossover brainchild Toulon with demonic toys. In general, it should be interesting, since the crossover with Dollman was already (very average), and here Band brings together all its main offspring. That is, this film shows us that Toulon dolls, demonic toys and shorts from two old films are all one universe created by Charles Band, who rode a little on dolls.
So, before us the horror Teda Nikolau "Lord of puppets against demonic toys". Immediately a little tense that this is a TV movie (and not just a TV movie, but for the good old SyFy), and the old man is listed here in the executive producers, and only. And this is really noticeable - maybe the director and Nikolau, but the film is not made by Ful Moon. The handwriting is not perfect. Why - let's figure it out.
The plot, as usual, is simple - we are introduced to the heir to Toulon, who is trying to revive the dolls. At the same time, the Toulon formula learns about the toy corporation, which calls for demonic toys to take away this formula. Well, in the last 10 minutes, the battle is underway - Toulon dolls against demonic toys.
I don’t remember the story in 4 lines in my reviews, but I really don’t have much more to say about this film. And this action lasted for 88 minutes. Another story that could fit in at 40. Basically, the characters are talking to each other, there are a couple of action scenes, which is strange for the “Lord of the Dolls”, but the situation is not particularly salvageable.
The film is generally saturated with the spirit of Christmas, because everything happens on the eve itself and the plan of this corporation for the production of toys is that they will steal the Toulon formula and animated by them toys will cut the children who will open their Christmas gifts. The joke is that the main character only tried to revive his 4 dolls for a good half of the film, so how long does it take the corporation to revive all its dolls? Logic, as usual, lame on both legs. The house of the main character is also somehow always open, even when he is not at home, which is quite strange.
The fact that this is not Full Moon is visible not only by the lack of an opening screensaver, but also by the level of production. Sleepwalkers have always been famous for their pressing cheap atmosphere, boring action, but with some zest, or something. But in this film, the highlight is only the final battle, which still has to live. The atmosphere? Well, it is a weak spirit of Christmas, but there is no gloom, usual company, nothing!
To sum up: a weak film, which is interesting only the idea of crossing one character with another. Yes, they will meet at the end, that is of course, about the title of the film. But 75 minutes before the final battle is an extremely sluggish Christmas movie with a shortage of thoughtful dialogue. And yes, look better in the original - the only existing translation into Russian is made at the level of 5-6 classes. I won’t even talk about the voiceover... If it is difficult to watch in the original - then skipping this film, you will not lose anything, you can just watch the last 10 minutes, there is no translation required.
Thank you for your attention
He put his life on it...
(approximately 3 minutes of the film)
Lord of puppets against demonic toys
I bet Band is a Band. A few months ago, the Little Reich came out. Yes, the thirteenth part of the “Lord of the Dolls”, creepy, but now (with your permission) we will plunge into the ninth.
Recall, the eighth film called Legacy, oh, angered even the most loyal fans of the franchise. Charles slipped a slice (from previous parts) of an old sausage. Naturally, he wanted to sneeze for criticism (habitual), so “Lord of dolls against demonic toys” appeared a year after “Heritage”.
The picture looks funnier (much), but I don’t want to justify all this nonsense, get me wrong. Why? Hold your fingers. One, Ted Nikolau. Nikolau is a tough guy. He has Teleterror, he has Subspecies, he has Dangerous Wave. Great old pictures.
I am very sad that Nikolau gave his approval and signed. The destruction of (more or less) normal filmography. Two, actors. In the film you can see Corey Feldman and Vanessa Angel. It's the destruction of childhood. He enjoyed various horror films (for example, Blood Brothel). She was delighted with the role of Lisa (series Wonders of Science).
Looking at their acting efforts (hell, Feldman’s hero has a daughter here, he doesn’t look like his father at all, he’s creepy) is damn painful. The third, sluggish plot, an evil corporation wants Toulon's secret. Fourth, this whole thing takes place on Christmas Eve. Who loves Christmas the most? Me! Destroying the senses.
Five, the title of the movie. From it we can conclude that we will be shown the battle. In the right corner are Toulon dolls, in the left corner are demonic toys (the original was shot by Manugyan in 1992, if not aware). Nothing like that. The war between dolls and toys is five minutes of screen time. "Freddy vs. Jason" becomes the perfect showdown, e-mine.
Check out the budget. You could've done a real thrash massacre. Where did they leak it? The actors, I guess. The animation of the dolls is not impressive (standard). Why were they taking them? To go on with the franchise. The franchise will last as long as its founding father lives.
I don’t recommend it, but if you’re from a Heritage session, try it.
P.S.
Demonic toys have already fought one battle. In 1993, they fought with the Dollman. Similar hat!
2004. The main franchise Full Moon "Lord of the Dolls" is in crisis. Its previous part, “Heritage”, and the film is difficult to call, almost the entire timekeeping took a retelling of the previous series. What, you can't get up after that? Figs, decided Charles Band. And applied the same resuscitation method to Toulon dolls that had been used on Freddie and Jason before. Pushing dolls into battle with other monsters is not the solution. And since for the fourth time, Sutek’s henchmen will not roll on dolls, the battle was given to dolls from another Fullmunian bi-movie “Demon Toys”. On one side the demon Bel and his faithful toys, on the other - a modified Blade plus three more Toulon dolls for the company. Who what? Found a budget of 2.4 million, put in the director's chair Ted Nikolau, who has already finished with "Subspecies" - and produced this crossover.
The fact that Nikolau is a mediocre director, I saw in “Subspecies”. There was good music in that franchise, good landscapes, but there was no good directing. It was boring and boring.
In The Master of Dolls vs. Demon Toys, the directing is even worse. Sorry. After all, the film became more comedic than any previous part of “Lord”. In the old parts, we could laugh too - with rubber Sutek, special effects, and a lot of things! But the creators themselves did not shoot comedies, nonsense was served there with a serious face. In the crossover, they joke intentionally, in the atmosphere it's kind of like a shitty thrashak, which does not try to be serious. But the trouble is that he doesn’t want to have fun. More sleepy. And the reason for this is the boring direction of Nikolau. The main reason, but not the only one. There are two more.
1. Poor Russian voiceover. The translation often “lies”, but this is half the trouble – it reads with a bored and very murmuring voice. You might say, “Watch the movie in the original!” Okay, we'll do that. And we will come across a second ambush.
2. The name of this ambush is Corey Feldman. Old man, what have you come to... Full Moon is not good enough. But you could at least try to pull this movie out of the swamp, flash acting even in treshak, show the other actors how to play! But no, during the filming, Feldman had a clear lack of sleep, and he played so sluggishly that watching his acting attempts, not for long and fall asleep. And, Corey, what happened to your voice? Why is he so hot? It hurts to listen, and when a wretched Russian voiceover is imposed on this voice, it hurts doubly.
There are advantages to this spectacle, too. Good cheerful music (although the themes from the “Lord of the Dolls” we will not hear, we will accept this); at the end of the movie rocks and demonstrates, albeit budget, but cute battles. I also liked the updated Toulon puppets, especially the Jester. He was the weakest and most useless doll - and he became quite combat-ready, even well pouted demonic toys. But these advantages do not compensate for the numerous drawbacks of the crossover. I was expecting the worst from the movie. But the film is, of course, weak, and Nikolau's director is weak - it's not even the level of Subspecies 3.
Compact and deadly. Conflict Ninth: Attack of the pups and dark forces.
The small town is covered with haze, people smile, hurry to shop. The spirit of Christmas permeated the city, toys rush under the tree, and parents give the children joy. The mistress of a toy factory, the domineering Cruella de Villa, for subordinates just Miss Erica Sharp. The business lady who feeds the whole city, the master of children's dreams and the mistress of the situation. Christmas Eve prepares the whole world a nasty surprise. The city and the world will know the true power of evil. After all, Miss Sharp is not a good mistress of the factory of children's dreams, she serves the very forces of evil, on a short leg with an ancient demon. Sharp has freed him, through the efforts of the nasty henchmen, the demon will reign on earth. The plan of a toy tycoon in a female guise is insidious, Erica wants to serve a multi-horned lord with a red stigma, through her influences and universal childish love for the products of the factory, Erica will capture and conquer the souls of the innocent inhabitants of the town. Toulon's sudden grandnephew continues the business as it should in the closet. Nature compensates for the grandchildren of geniuses, so Robert, a shaggy scientist, puppeteer and owner of a puppet hospital, lives under the same roof with a daughter-hacker, and blowing into a mustache repairs broken dolls, and generally lives chorusily. Robert is the new overlord, the Blade, the pin, the Hexloader, the Jester, they are his new servants, and his experimental material. Where the Torch, the Leech and the Tunnelman went is not explained. Maybe they finally sold out. Bend didn't have time to order new ones. Or they just didn't have enough Toulon reagent. The secrets of the old master are not fully disclosed, it impulsively responds to the mind of Robert. He's crazy, but a kind, kind wizard for that matter, except he doesn't have a castle, he has a puppet hospital. This is sweet, the heir does not appear half a day as a bastard, although with a completely runaway roof. Every day he becomes more insane in his experiments. He does not realize that the experiments conducted in the home basement will be a key stage in the victory over the evil forces represented by the sinister Erica Sharp.
The owner of the toy factory keeps aces up her sleeve, in contrast to the experimental material of Robert Toulon in her service are old acquaintances - Upsy-Daisy, a foul-mouthed navel, a gluttonous bear, unfortunately, not to spread into a giant plush monster, and Jack from the box - a snake-like jester hunting to be cut with triangular teeth, pieces of human meat. It is expected a great showdown for the fate of the city. And the world will be small, because on Christmas Eve.
The ninth sequel, either cover the bench or improvise. Charlie improvised, but not himself, wisely handed over the burden of directorial responsibility to Ted Nikolau. The hardworking Romanian took into account all the nuances and began to work without putting up callosum hands. Much more successful candidacy in the director's chair. Father Radu knows how to shoot. Subtly considering all the factors, relying on the main one - he shoots for the b-movie universe, and it should not leave for a minute. Puppets meet demon dolls, and what awaits us?
Let’s start with the first causal factor – the film was made for television, which Nikolau also took into account. For broadcast on TV, in the daytime, for children, for Christmas holidays. For the smallest residents, and small provincial towns. The crossover pits the inhabitants of the Full Moon universe against each other in a deadly battle. However, the strings of dolls, all, pulls not Charlie Band, namely Nikolau. Maybe I should say a few warm words to Charlie, if he had contributed a bit of his vision to Part 9, it would have been more successful. How unusual to see such a combination of openly children's play, with frankly dirty humor that savor the characters. (This is if you watch the film in the original translation, because Russian distributors with their inherent love all the sharpness missed or ignored.) A children's matinee, directed by a kind Romanian, however, is leaving. Corey Feldman, a kind doctor who has a psychopath, a naive figure of basement experiments, and in the left corner - an evil aunt who wants to ruin a sweet holiday. Such a confrontation is sure to please children, despite the fact that the demon of the underworld is not terrible, but rather as an entertainer on the morning in DK. The battle of the titans to go straight to dividi, favorite heroes under a snow whirlwind, without snow as such, a play for children, without light nudity, which took place in previous parts. The atmosphere of the chromopod Christmas is partly due to the sultry Californian landscapes, green leaves and meadows, forgive me, no magical spirit of Christmas will not convey. Although filming there is certainly cheaper. Thanks to Charles for that.
After what Charles Band, the producer of all parts of the movie series “The Lord of the Dolls”, in the last part – in the “Legacy” of 2003 – it seemed that he and his associates in the production of low-quality horror films had exhausted their imagination about this franchise, which began in 1989 and produced as many as nine parts. But no. Screenwriter S. Courtney Joyner came up with a sequel, the so-called “crossover”, which means combining two different films into one. Examples include Freddy v. Jason (2003) and Alien v. Predator (2004). In this case, in one bottle were poured “Demonic toys” and, in fact, “Lord of the puppets”.
If we take the beginning of the "Lord of the Dolls", then without a blink of conscience we can say that the animate puppets of the master Andre Toulon did nothing but cut, strangle and shoot everyone who tried to approach the master's secret. In the future, the instinct of the puppets received some changes and they seemed to even become champions of good, only evil champions, and they killed only all the bad guys. But the characters of “Demonic Toys” are often disgusting creatures, in which even a little good can not be understood. Thus, we get in the movie “Lord of puppets against demonic toys” a classic clash of good and evil. But, of course, it is said quite loudly.
Only the most ardent fans of horror from the so-called category “B” with rapture could expect an epic battle in the film. But let's be honest, a $2.4 million budget wouldn't have produced anything visually vibrant and professional, given the drastically declining quality of films from Charles Band's co-stars. Rather, in this film, the assiduous viewer will get something resembling a horror comedy from the puppet theater, where only the strings controlled by puppets are not visible. With all the desire to be afraid of something here will not work and if it happened that I had to watch “Lord of puppets against demonic toys”, then first you need to relax and try to enjoy as a funny joke.
In this film you will also get acquainted with the young relative of Andre Toulon Robert, who, in fact, became the new owner of animate puppets. It is now set up for him by the envious Erica Sharp and the demon Bel, and Robert Toulon can only fight back with the support of his puppets. Roberta was played by actor Corey Feldman. At one time, he lit up in the landmark franchise “Friday the 13th”, but there was a film thanks to which he could have a breakthrough: in 1986, the teenage drama “Stay with Me” based on the novel by Stephen King himself and shot by Rob Reiner was released. The young River Phoenix, Jerry O’Connell and Kiefer Sutherland played in that film, but Feldman came to play in such a consumer product as The Doll Lord vs. Demon Toys, and his play makes it clear why Feldman never became a big actor. No better looked and Vanessa Angel with Danielle Keaton.
So the only option at least some pleasure from the crossover “Lord of dolls vs. demonic toys” is to watch one doll fight another, but this is not an epic battle, of course, this is a low-quality spectacle that you should expect from a film with a budget of $ 2.4 million, so make your own conclusions – should you spend your precious time watching the ninth film in the franchise “Lord of the dolls”.
4 out of 10